Read More: A brief Q&A with Joan Mazza
Autonomous Zone
Books keep coming, stacking up on end tables,
coffee table, night stands. They migrate to
the basement, wait to be shelved. Hard covers
and paperbacks, cookbooks, art, novels, poetry,
all calling my childhood name. No one says
I can’t buy more, no one to snort at bookmarks,
like Heidi did with an added groan at my
habits. I didn’t live with her, didn’t comment
on her housekeeping or hordes of pets.
My sleep isn’t tied to a clock or alarm. I listen
to my body’s call to light a fire in the wood stove
or raise the thermostat. I look outward and register
for classes. Tomorrow I’ll go underground, might
not answer the phone. On rainy days, who am I?
Identity fluid, moving, without gender or fixed
style, quiet or outspoken, flashy and shy, a bucket
of memories overflowing onto pages I’m free
to burn. I peruse dog rescue sites, mop cat vomit,
argue with myself about how my life could improve
with a canine who doesn’t chase felines. Too
much to care for? Or not enough love and touch
in my life? Yesterday I made pizza and shared
with a neighbor. Today I’ll make cards to send
with get-well wishes and sympathy. I’m putting
in an elevator before I need one. In this zone,
I am the sole authority, owner, boss of myself,
queen of the castle, no need to defer to a king.
Still Cautious
Not immortal, not immune, and not
vaccinated, I’m staying home. If I
consume only what I already have
in stock and have prepared and frozen,
I could eat for months. I won’t run out
of tissues or toilet paper or paper towels, […]
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To Clarify
I was not raised in a barn or raised by wolves,
have never had a vision of a ghost or demon
or the Virgin Mary offering a prophecy. Long ago,
I wanted to be famous, to build a thriving empire
by speaking wisdom and writing bestselling books, […]
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Joan Mazza has worked as a medical microbiologist, psychotherapist, and taught workshops on understanding dreams and nightmares. She is the author of six books, including Dreaming Your Real Self, and her poetry has appeared in Valparaiso Poetry Review, Prairie Schooner, Adanna Literary Journal, Poet Lore, and The Nation. She lives in rural central Virginia, where she is self-isolating and writing a poem every day. www.JoanMazza.com.
Read More: A brief Q&A with Joan Mazza